The last few months I've been away because I took a break from social media. That includes all of it, email, facebook, cafemom, and my blog. Last year when our financial downfall became worse, and it felt as though everything in front of me was crumbling away I needed to stand back and re-evaluate. I was consumed in negativity. I felt like the funk that was surrounding me was never going to let go. I tried to pretend like it wasn't there, but there came a point where I couldn't fight it. It was everywhere and it took hold.
I used to be on Facebook almost every day, sometimes several times a day. But when I found the only thing I wanted to write in the status bar was something negative I started to fade away from it completely. Then came the emails I didn't want to keep writing to my friends and telling them I was fine when I wasn't, and at the same time I didn't want to keep telling them I was miserable and bring them down with me. I realize that my decision was selfish, but I'm truly not sorry I did it, because I don't think I would have been able to be where I am right this second had I not done things the way I did.
In May of last year we received a foreclosure notice on our house. That was the turning point for me. I was so sad and filled with anger and emotions I had no idea where to place I spent several days just crying and sitting in a sack of whoa is me. Sad sight to see it was. The light that was leading me to better days was gone. Losing my house, at the time to me felt like doom. I just couldn't imagine leaving my home, that I helped build, where I brought my 3 beautiful children into the world, where I shared so many amazing moments and memories! This is my home, and you will not take it! I said that over and over but knew it was very possible the house was going to go no matter how loud I shouted.
The next several months went by with much the same. Television and Internet were disconnected, even the power was off a few times. Then came winter and we were sitting here cold many days. How frustrating, and how embarrassed I felt. I was ashamed. Ashamed that I couldn't give my children the life they deserved, that basic necessities were difficult to get and sometimes impossible. How sad for them I felt that their parents were letting them down. Then came the day it all changed. Though it would seem the day we saved the house from foreclosure would be the turning point, that wasn't it. It was the week before school was starting and I was going through all the beautiful things my family had gotten the children to get them ready. It was a moment that only happened in a few minutes, but it was a huge moment. At the dining room table my daughter heard the phone ringing and the answer machine came on.
"Mr. Raymond, this is the bank manager, I just wanted to tell you that you only have 2 more weeks to come up with the payments you'll need to stay in your house."
There it was the moment of, oh shit, now my children know. I cringed with anger and fear. Why hadn't I just stopped what I was doing for that minute and answered the damn phone! Why didn't I always keep the answering machine volume turned to zero, especially when all the messages were horrible!
So there I sat in complete ice cold fear. I glanced at my son and he was busy putting labels on his new folders, my other son was checking out his awesome new backpack with really awesome reflectors.
Then to my daughter, who sat directly in front of me, staring at me with those huge brown eyes. She wouldn't move an inch, and I thought oh dear god help me through this. My daughter looked at me and said
"Mommy, what does that message mean".
I wanted to lie, I really did, but it dawned on me we may not be able to save this house, and they will need to know, and I would feel much worse telling them when we were packing.
"Annelyse, there is a chance that Daddy and I will not be able to afford our house anymore, and if that happens we will have to move out".
"Mommy, why are you crying".
"Because I didn't want to tell you, and I don't want you to be scared".
"I'm not scared". said my very calm and beautiful daughter.
"You're not?" I asked.
"No, I'm not scared of anything like that". she said as she continued coloring her name tags.
"Well that's so wonderful you would say that, and I'm so proud of you for being brave". I said knowing what a wimp I was, and how brave she was.... Then came the moment... the simple, very quick amazing moment....
"Mommy, you should be brave too, and you shouldn't be sad. Look at all of these cool things we have that Grammy, Kimmy and Rosie got us. We have so many things Mommy, it's easy to be brave".
I didn't understand what she was saying I really didn't. I asked her if she understood what I had just told her, and she said she did.
"I understand Mommy, we might have to move out of our house".
"Ok" I replied, still not sure if she really knew the depth of what I told her.
"Mommy it doesn't matter where we live, we will always be together, and we will always have just what we need. We don't need this house to be ok Mommy, we just need us".
There it was. The moment. That one damn moment changed me to the core. My 8 year old daughter looking me straight in the eye telling me what I should of been saying. I swear God spoke through her that day. The light came back. It was so bright I could hardly stand it. That moment I realized I was being so selfish, and it was time to stop. My children weren't suffering, they weren't dwelling on what they didn't have. I was! They were enjoying all the wonderful things they did have! They were living happily. I don't know why I didn't see it before that moment, but I didn't. But when I saw it, it was the most wonderful and amazing sight I had ever seen. It was living in the moment, enjoying the little gifts we receive every single day. The tree's that change color and look so beautiful. The different clouds that form and look like all sorts of amazing dinosaurs. The way the sunlight hits your eye and lights it up like a beautiful marble with brilliant colors. The way you feel all warm and fuzzy when your child gives you a hug. The beautiful moments we share every night when it's time for bed. The way a kiss can make your heart flutter. The taste of your favorite meal. The laughs we share every night at dinner talking about our day.... The one moment it took to wake me up gave me millions of more moments to remember, and to look forward to. That was a very good day.
So, my friends I leave you with this. Sometimes life is a real pain in the ass. It can swiftly change and knock the wind out of you. You can take them with despair like I did, and feel like you would never be happy again, OR you can kick life right back. Let yourself revel in the little moments. The small things that mean so much more. Smile whenever you want to. Do not feel like you have to be sad when times are rough. Keep your sanity when life tries over and over to take it. Live in the moment. The old saying that until my moment I never took seriously. Four words that can change your entire way of thinking. Tomorrow is always going to come no matter how far away it seems. Grab your moments and smile.
Showing posts with label scary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label scary. Show all posts
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Victim of fraud!
WOW, where to start on this. Yesterday was by far one of the scariest moments in my entire 38 years of life. Sadly, I have been a victim of fraud. I was working on my computer when I recieved a voice mail message on my cell phone. The man who left a message spoke very threatening, and loud. He explained that I needed to have my lawyer, or myself call right now, as he yelled into my voice mail, and that if I didn't call all he could do was wish me good luck. I have to say the instant I heard that my heart began pounding, and my hands started shaking. I was beyond scared, but had no idea why.
What I will say is these people are good at being evil. They are truly good at the venom they spew. It's a sad reality that we have to be victims to this. So basically what happend was I called this number, and though I now see the signs they were completely fake, I didn't see them at all when it was initially happening, because I was scared. A man got on the phone and asked me to not interrupt him while he read me the affidavit against me. He began telling me, while using technical terms that on Thursday I would be arrested and held in jail until the following Monday where I would go to court, and when I was found guilty for "check fraud" and stealing money from American Cash/PayDay Loans I would be held responsible for $5484.87 and in addition to that would be responsible for court and lawyer fees totaling upwards of 8 to 9000.00. Then they asked me to give them my lawyers number. WHICH was my first mistake. I should have done that immediately, but I was scared, and wasn't thinking. So I start screaming at this man and asking him what I have done, and he asks me why I was so ignorant that I did not know what I had done! I said well to start because I haven't done anything, and I did not take a loan out EVER! So he then begins to tell me maybe someone stole my information but that the Federal Government had been monitoring me on my email, and they gave me my correct email address, they gave me my correct social security number. They had just about ALL of my personal information. So after me screaming at them for a few minutes they tell me as long as I have never been arrested, or held for a criminal activity they would settle this with me with an OOCR "out of court restitution". So they gave me to another woman. I am so uspet and shaking at this point I am thinking what the hell is going on here. I start screaming at her too, she interrupts me and says that this supposed loan company put $791.23 into my account and when they tried to get their payment back they couldn't. So they were suing me for check fraud, and other charges I didn't understand. So I tell her no one has ever put money in my account, whats the account number. She gives me my personal account number! Now I'm freaking out. I ask her how to settle this in the supposed OOCR, she tells me to go to walmart and get a green dot money card for the amount and call them back in a half an hour and their lawyers were working on my case and would settle this out of court, and would fax me all the paperwork. As soon as she said go to walmart and get a green dot money card, she failed, and I knew it was fraud immediately. That's when all the other signs I had missed started to come clear to me. For example the continued need to put me on pause, the reading of the claims they supposedly said I was being charged for were read quickly, and I could hear things that made no sense. Though her name was Erika Burkens, she had a very thick accent. Though the mans name was Travis, he too had an extrememly thick accent. When I first called and said someone left me a message to call this number she asked me what phone number they called! That should have been my first clue! I gave her my cell number and it took her several minutes to find me. It was ridiculous. She claimed she had PROOF they put money into my account. I should have known that was not true, but again I was scared, and they were so mean and aggressive it was believable. I should have known that even had I gotten a loan from someone they wouldn't have just called me and said the company wishes to have me arrested rather than settle financially, yet when pushed they decide to accept the payment. There were so many things they said that didn't add up.
I told her ok I'll go get that green dot card and call you back. I asked who to call and at what number, she told me the same number and her name which was Erika Burkens. I hung up and cried my eyes out, b/c I knew I had to calm down to get through this. I called my husband, who was more annoyed than anything, but I also don't think he realized what I was a victim of just yet. His irritated tone calmed me down, and though it wasn't what I wanted to hear from him, it got me back to reality so that I could calm myself down and call my lawyer. I called the lawyer and the secretary asked me what was wrong, and I started bawling my eyes out and said that some company said I stole money and she interrupted me and asked me if they said this, and if they said that and I said YES YES! They did! She said calm down, it's ok you are not going to jail, but you are a victim of fraud. She explained what I had to do, and she explained that it happend to her, and she told me what they did, and how good they are at it, and that is how they steal your money. Because most people will just go pay them even though they aren't guilty b/c they scare you into thinking you have done something, and they take your 800.00 and then they disappear, OR they keep victimizing you over and over. I had to call my bank and close my bank account, I had to report my social security number to the social security administration, and I have to change my cell phone number. When I didn't call them back they called my cell phone every 2 minutes and left me very threatening, harassing messages.
The reason I am sharing this, is because I want you all to know what to look for. Do not let them scare you, and do not let them take your money! When I googled this company hundreds of other victims names and stories came up. They are getting away with this every single day, and taking innocent peoples money! One day they will mess up, but in the mean time they are violating us over and over again. I feel so violated, and vulnerable it's hard to explain. They claimed they had proof money was given to me, and even though I was going through my account as I spoke to them and could see that this had never happend I still believed them! I was almost going to get them this money to stop me from going to jail. I believed them for an hour. I was victimized, and thankfully it didn't go too far, but their are others who it has, and they have had money stolen.
I hope that someone else see's this message and this helps you. I hope that you will not have to go through any of this, but if you do, know that this is a HUGE illegal scam and their are things you can do to report them. One day they will mess up, they will vicitmize the wrong person one time and they will crack this. Someday they will be arrested, and put in jail themselves. But until theanm we have to protect ourselves.
I have learned a huge lesson, and in many ways I know this will teach me something valuable someday. Though right now I just feel sad, and hurt I know it will help me with something else in the future, and I will be damned if I stop telling this so that other people can hear my story and do not go through any of it, and especially so no one gives them a dime of their money! These people are pigs, criminals that don't care about anyone but themselves, and they will keep stealing from innocent people until someone stops them!
Many blessings to all of you!! Feel free to share my story if you think this will help!
Much love!
What I will say is these people are good at being evil. They are truly good at the venom they spew. It's a sad reality that we have to be victims to this. So basically what happend was I called this number, and though I now see the signs they were completely fake, I didn't see them at all when it was initially happening, because I was scared. A man got on the phone and asked me to not interrupt him while he read me the affidavit against me. He began telling me, while using technical terms that on Thursday I would be arrested and held in jail until the following Monday where I would go to court, and when I was found guilty for "check fraud" and stealing money from American Cash/PayDay Loans I would be held responsible for $5484.87 and in addition to that would be responsible for court and lawyer fees totaling upwards of 8 to 9000.00. Then they asked me to give them my lawyers number. WHICH was my first mistake. I should have done that immediately, but I was scared, and wasn't thinking. So I start screaming at this man and asking him what I have done, and he asks me why I was so ignorant that I did not know what I had done! I said well to start because I haven't done anything, and I did not take a loan out EVER! So he then begins to tell me maybe someone stole my information but that the Federal Government had been monitoring me on my email, and they gave me my correct email address, they gave me my correct social security number. They had just about ALL of my personal information. So after me screaming at them for a few minutes they tell me as long as I have never been arrested, or held for a criminal activity they would settle this with me with an OOCR "out of court restitution". So they gave me to another woman. I am so uspet and shaking at this point I am thinking what the hell is going on here. I start screaming at her too, she interrupts me and says that this supposed loan company put $791.23 into my account and when they tried to get their payment back they couldn't. So they were suing me for check fraud, and other charges I didn't understand. So I tell her no one has ever put money in my account, whats the account number. She gives me my personal account number! Now I'm freaking out. I ask her how to settle this in the supposed OOCR, she tells me to go to walmart and get a green dot money card for the amount and call them back in a half an hour and their lawyers were working on my case and would settle this out of court, and would fax me all the paperwork. As soon as she said go to walmart and get a green dot money card, she failed, and I knew it was fraud immediately. That's when all the other signs I had missed started to come clear to me. For example the continued need to put me on pause, the reading of the claims they supposedly said I was being charged for were read quickly, and I could hear things that made no sense. Though her name was Erika Burkens, she had a very thick accent. Though the mans name was Travis, he too had an extrememly thick accent. When I first called and said someone left me a message to call this number she asked me what phone number they called! That should have been my first clue! I gave her my cell number and it took her several minutes to find me. It was ridiculous. She claimed she had PROOF they put money into my account. I should have known that was not true, but again I was scared, and they were so mean and aggressive it was believable. I should have known that even had I gotten a loan from someone they wouldn't have just called me and said the company wishes to have me arrested rather than settle financially, yet when pushed they decide to accept the payment. There were so many things they said that didn't add up.
I told her ok I'll go get that green dot card and call you back. I asked who to call and at what number, she told me the same number and her name which was Erika Burkens. I hung up and cried my eyes out, b/c I knew I had to calm down to get through this. I called my husband, who was more annoyed than anything, but I also don't think he realized what I was a victim of just yet. His irritated tone calmed me down, and though it wasn't what I wanted to hear from him, it got me back to reality so that I could calm myself down and call my lawyer. I called the lawyer and the secretary asked me what was wrong, and I started bawling my eyes out and said that some company said I stole money and she interrupted me and asked me if they said this, and if they said that and I said YES YES! They did! She said calm down, it's ok you are not going to jail, but you are a victim of fraud. She explained what I had to do, and she explained that it happend to her, and she told me what they did, and how good they are at it, and that is how they steal your money. Because most people will just go pay them even though they aren't guilty b/c they scare you into thinking you have done something, and they take your 800.00 and then they disappear, OR they keep victimizing you over and over. I had to call my bank and close my bank account, I had to report my social security number to the social security administration, and I have to change my cell phone number. When I didn't call them back they called my cell phone every 2 minutes and left me very threatening, harassing messages.
The reason I am sharing this, is because I want you all to know what to look for. Do not let them scare you, and do not let them take your money! When I googled this company hundreds of other victims names and stories came up. They are getting away with this every single day, and taking innocent peoples money! One day they will mess up, but in the mean time they are violating us over and over again. I feel so violated, and vulnerable it's hard to explain. They claimed they had proof money was given to me, and even though I was going through my account as I spoke to them and could see that this had never happend I still believed them! I was almost going to get them this money to stop me from going to jail. I believed them for an hour. I was victimized, and thankfully it didn't go too far, but their are others who it has, and they have had money stolen.
I hope that someone else see's this message and this helps you. I hope that you will not have to go through any of this, but if you do, know that this is a HUGE illegal scam and their are things you can do to report them. One day they will mess up, they will vicitmize the wrong person one time and they will crack this. Someday they will be arrested, and put in jail themselves. But until theanm we have to protect ourselves.
I have learned a huge lesson, and in many ways I know this will teach me something valuable someday. Though right now I just feel sad, and hurt I know it will help me with something else in the future, and I will be damned if I stop telling this so that other people can hear my story and do not go through any of it, and especially so no one gives them a dime of their money! These people are pigs, criminals that don't care about anyone but themselves, and they will keep stealing from innocent people until someone stops them!
Many blessings to all of you!! Feel free to share my story if you think this will help!
Much love!
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