My youngest son, Ayden, the foofer. What a joy he is. He was a surprise, a big wonderful surprise. I had planned only one of my pregnancies. My first. Annelyse and Ayden, were not planned, they were instead wonderful surprises. Of course my son Kevin was just as wonderful a surprise. I often think that each of my children have something special planned for us. God gave them to me, but it is the world that they will make their impact on. I was blessed right from the start. I plan to introduce you to all 3 of my children individually, I'd like to dedicate this post to Ayden, my little foofer man.
I had woke up one morning with horrible stomach pains. I had already lost my appendix so I knew it wasn't that. It was just an awful stabbing pain, that would not leave me. I called my husband and he took me to urgent care. I had a sonogram and they told me I had a large cyst, and would need to go to the hospital to have it drained. On the way to the hospital my husband and I were talking about having my tubes tied. You see my husband has 2 boys from a previous marriage, and when we first began getting serious, he always wanted to make it clear to me that he didn't want any children. That wasn't going to work out so well for me, and my plan. We had actually considered splitting up at one point, because we just couldn't agree on this. I felt very strongly that I was put on this earth to become a mother, and he was either going to have to let me go my own way, or we would have to come to an understanding that I would be able to be a Mother. It makes me chuckle a bit now to think how he was so sure I would only have one. Just one child, that was what he would agree on. Clearly God had other plans. Anyway, on the way to the hospital, we were discussing that I would have my tubes tied. We figured since they were going to be in that general area removing my cyst they may as well do that also. I was in so much pain I didn't really care much about it. I agreed to tell them to tie my tubes. I later came to regret that decision, but that is not what my story is about right now.
We met my doctor in the emergency room, and I signed all of my paperwork, and informed her that I would also like her to tie my tubes. She gave me the necessary paperwork for that, and we were on our way to surgery. The surgery went very well, and they tied my tubes as well. While in recovery I remember speaking to my doctor. Though I was very foggy, it came very clear soon after what it was she told me. However as they were wheeling me to my room, I kept having this strange thought that someone told me I was pregnant. Was that what they told me? Or was I simply feeling delusional from the anesthesia? They wheeled me into my room and I saw my husband on the other side, sitting in a chair with his back to the door looking out the window. He would not look at me. I started to quickly realize that I may have not been so foggy after all. The nurse got me all set up and I asked if the doctor would be in, and she told me very soon. Thank heavens because the awkward silence that had now ensued between me and my husband was starting to really work my nerves. Finally my doctor came in and she had my husband step out so she could examine me. I was so thankful for that as I was anxious to speak with her alone. I said "I hate to sound like a bit of a nut, but I was wondering if you had told me while in recovery that I was pregnant?" her reply, "Yes"
My mind went into a million directions. She started her explaining, which at first was really confusing. She had tied my tubes, however my uterus looked as though it were preparing for a pregnancy. I had so many questions!! Did that mean my baby was not going to be ok, I mean she did say she tied my tubes!! Thankfully, she quickly explained my baby would be fine, if I am in fact pregnant because once the egg passes through the tubes, they serve no other purpose during pregnancy. Phew! Well long story short, I was in fact pregnant, and my tubes were tied. Oh what a joy that was explaining it to the different doctors I saw each month at my prenatal appointments. When you have more than one child it is common for the doctors to ask you if you would like your tubes tied after the pregnancy. This being my third child they asked me every single time. It was always the same, "I already had them tied". "You what? Let me look at your chart" They would go through my chart, see that I was in fact correct, and they would always tell me how it was one they had not heard before. I was very nervous throughout Aydens pregnancy. I was so scared that the surgery would have harmed him. The anesthesia, the pain killers, the cyst being removed. Did I hurt him? Because of the surgery I had to see the doctor more often then normal, and had many sonograms to make sure he was ok. I was very lucky, he was perfect in every way. Still is. Ayden was born on July 4th. A perfectly awesome day to be born. He still feels very strongly that America celebrates HIS birthday each year with fireworks. I'll always remember when Ayden was born, the nurses brought him in to me that evening, and he lay sound asleep on my chest and I looked out the window and saw the most beautiful fireworks. It was the most beautiful half an hour. His sweet breathing sounds, and he was all snuggled in to my arms. It was a magical moment that I will cherish forever.
Ayden is just a wonderful boy. He's so funny!! He can put a smile on your face no matter how bad your day has been. He can dance and sing, tell silly jokes, make funny faces. He is so smart! He is already reading, and on top of his class. He has quite a crush on his teacher Mrs. Bury. He just adores her, and she him. When he went to kindergarten this year, my heart felt as though it would burst. Each time my children start school, I cry and cry for weeks. I would be just as happy if they stayed with me forever. Realistically though I know this can not be, and so I reluctantly send them.
I can't help but wonder if Ayden has a mission while he's here. He was coming into our lives whether my husband liked it at first or not. You know he and my husband are so close. They have the most adorable relationship. When I see them together I sometimes am brought back to that day in the hospital room when he wouldn't even look at me, as though I had somehow become pregnant through immaculate conception, and he had no part in it at all. How upset he was that we would be having a third child, and now he could not imagine his life without all 3 of them. It's funny how that happens isn't it? You may think you know what's right for your life, but God knows best doesn't he? He knew that we needed Ayden, and he was right. What a glorious gift.
My wish for Ayden, Kevin and Annelyse is that they get out of this life, just as much as they have given mine. They are all so special, and so unique. They love without want, and they give without regret. I didn't teach them that. They brought that with them. I firmly believe that some things a person has in them, can not be taught. It's something that is just within them. A piece of heaven, right there in their little hearts. Not a day goes by that I'm not thankful for my children. I often worry that I'm not doing them justice. That's me though, I'm a worrier. I always worry that I am not doing enough, then something will happen that changes my mind.
Ayden lost his first tooth last night. While the pulling was not so smooth, once it was out, he exclaimed it was the best day ever. His eyes were so bright with excitement. He was so mad at his brother for not going to sleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. I heard more then a few times during the night "Kevin you have to go to sleep NOW or the tooth fairy isn't going to come". He woke up this morning, and couldn't wait to look and see what she brought him. I asked him if he heard her come in during the night, and he said that he did, and she gave him a hug! He wanted to bring his new toothbrush, and 4 dollars to school to show the teacher, but luckily I was able to convince him to just tell her the story instead. He smiled all the way to school this morning, and his new hole in his mouth looked just perfect. He's also happily told us all what that new space in his mouth can do. He can make a noise that sounds just like a wind storm is coming, he can fit his straw in his mouth now without having to open it up, and he can fit pieces of food in there too.
The joy to be young, and see the world for all of it's beauty. There is no tainted pictures in their little minds to ruin the view. They only see things with joy, and excitement. The magic of all things, just like the tooth fairy. It's a beautiful thing.